Struggling in 2012...

I've been thinking about 2012 and all that it entails to ring in a new year and I am struggling with a word.  A word in inspire me through the new year, to focus on improvement/betterment/etc.

Here's the current struggles:
Finance:  I struggle because we make enough money to live and enjoy life, but not enough to not worry.   In 2012, I'd like to relax a bit more about our monthly expenses but also be looking forward to saving for bigger plans (not in 2012- like a kitchen renovation)

Family:  I have really enjoyed living in the moment in 2011 and will continue to do so.  I struggle with balancing time to myself and time with family and time at work. 

Self:  I love to blog, facebook, read, design, dream but I struggle with balancing that with family and productivity time. 

Organization:  Part of me says "Organization!" It's the way to go and part of me says "Who cares!"  I think more organization will take a lot of effort on my part but would alleviate some struggles on a daily basis (what to do with dinner, where to find that, storage/house stuff, etc).

Memories:  I struggle with living in the moment, and capturing it all and getting it down.  I love to look back on the year, but haven't found a project to stick with throughout the year.  

Job:  I struggle with balance on getting projects done, keeping caught up with my daily work, asking for what I need and being detailed enough.  Also struggle with leaving work at work.  Yet, I really enjoy my job most days, which means checking in from home is actually something I look forward to nearly each day. 

The words that I've tossed around so far are "peace "(it was on a candle I was gifted and it seems like a sign, but I have yet to make sense of that sign), "organize" and "live."  Perhaps another word will come to me.  Perhaps I'll start to jot things down here so they stop swirling in my head.

House Project update

Life Projects:
* Get Life Insurance for Matt and I
* Start 403b plan and putting $50/paycheck away to start- in progres, next step, roll over pension, submit thingy to HR.  Need to finalize. 
* Get a will in place
* Make a doctor's appointment with new doctor
* Talk to Financial Guy
* Get new insurance to save money-researched-no savings to be found :(
* Send Frye Boots in for stitching
* Get Library Card
* Update DMV with address
* Make Cashi's first year CD/Video montage-Made Book instead
* Scrapbook projects
      * Finish Wedding Scrapbook
      * Finish Family scrapbook
      * Finish College scrapbook
      * Finish 2010 Project Life scrapbook
* Taxes 2010

House Projects:
* Create chalkboard calendar
* Put up chalkboard calendar Deleted as the chalkboard thingy is in progress!
* Order windows
* Hall Bath Renovation
      * Many things have been completed but were not on this list, including: select paint, paint walls, cut wainscotting, buy and install light, patch up drywall
      *  Things to add: paint wainscotting, touch up paint, re-grout and seal floor (decided not to), paint trim/pieces, install fixtures, hang light after paint dries, caulk fixtures in shower, hang shower curtain rod,
      *  New additions: Hang Medicine cabinet, install final paint job/touch up on moulding/trim, install hooks
      * Find shelving for Hall Bath (none for now)
      * Obtain Mirror for Hall Bath
* Master Bath Renovation
      * Paint new sink base for Master Bath Renovation
* Repaint Master Bedroom
* Knock out wall between Kitchen and Living Room... really, did I put this on here.. this is probably 5 years down the road.  Progress!  We met with a designer who gave us some good ideas and an estimate.  Timeline is now probably 3 years down the road. 
     * Purchase new refrigerator
* Paint dining table?
* Paint chairs
* Paint Secretary?
* Paint Chalkboard Menu Thingy- It's cut!  Hang Chalkboard! Hang Chalkboard in Cashi's room!
      * Get shelf/Hang Shelf
* Figure out if Microwave can be fixed.  Figured out its a separate unit, so it can be replaced! Progress!
* Hang House Numbers 
* Rebuild/replace fence!  
* Replace deck
* Build Outdoor shower aka Matt's "Master Bathroom" project

23 Months

Dear Cassius,

We are approaching your 2nd birthday! Wowzer!

You are an incredible little boy and I'm so grateful that you are my kid!

A few fun memories:
* Yesterday, we woke up together and you watched some videos while we all got the energy to get out of bed.  We watched a Sesame Street video about things being "fragile" and then later in the day, your Grandma asked you to be careful with something and you said "fragile."  Holy Cow!  You really connect things!
* Speaking of "Be Careful"... You told me to "Be Careful (it sounds like Car-full) Mama" when I got up on the step ladder the other day.
* You talk up a storm.  Most of the time we can totally figure out what you are saying but last weekend you started saying what sounded like a full on sentence of gibberish that ended with "up in the sky."  We have no clue what you were saying. 
* You love to sing.  You sing "Twinkle, Twinkle lill tar,""Pat Cake,""Humpty Dumpty sat wall,""ABCEFGLMNOP," and other little songs.
* You started to go pee on the potty!  We've had numerous successes this past weekend!  Every time we ask if you want to go potty, you exclaim "Jeyye Bean, Mama?"  (Translation: Jelly Bean, Mama?).  Yes, you get 2 jelly beans if you "make a 'posit" (Make a Deposit) in the potty.  Yesterday, you wore big boy underpants for the first time.  You wore them for about 45 minutes and you didn't have one accident!

I'm gonna post this now, and then add some photos in a bit.

I Love You SOOOOOOOOOOOOO Much!

Mama

22 months

Dear Cassius,

You are a whole lot closer to 23 months now but this is your 22 month letter.

It seems like life is just speeding by sometimes.  I can hardly remember what happened yesterday let alone the last month.

A few funny thoughts from our last month together:
* I've got you saying "Please Mama Dear" and it's super cute.  We were at a party and another guest commented on your manners.  Apparently you asked some one for "more water, please".  Good job, buzz!  You say "no, please" instead of "no, thank you" :)
* You mimic just about anything we say, which is hilarious.  You'll say "awesome", "dude", and all sorts of other things.
* You love our neighbors, especially Megan.  To hear you say "Hi Megan" is about the cutest thing.  You also want to hug, hive five or kiss her or Don (her grandpa).  They've started to watch you a bit and you love it over there.
* You love tools.  Drills, Saws, Blowers, Lawn Mowers, Weed Wackers, Garbage Trucks... you know the names of all of them and you still love to "blow".
* You love the skateboard that you helped Daddy build.  You love to help daddy with projects, like the ramp you built.
* Dad reports that you planted your first bean!  Yeah!  You are still scared of the chickens, but you love to collect the eggs.  We are batting about .75 for making it into the house without breaking the egg.  You know all the names of the chickens!
* We went to a U-Pick farm and you picked and ate plenty of peaches and plums.  You were a complete beast as we tried to eat our lunch and you didn't fall asleep the entire way home :(
*You started a new daycare at Miss Karen's and you seem to love it!  You love Miriam and James and Cameron and talk about them often.  Apparently, they even have you practicing on the potty!
* You like to do a lot of things yourself "my do it" and you often want "whole fing" and not a piece of anything.
* Just the past few days you started to enjoy "being a baby" so that I'll hold you and sing to you.  It's pretty darn cute.  You started singing quite a few words to "itsy" and also to "Happy Birthday". 
* When you wake up in the morning, your little voice says "Mama! Come here!" so sweetly it melts my heart every morning, even if I don't really want to get up.

Despite the semi-frequent meltdowns, you are so fun to spend time with.  I love being your mama!

Love you Cashi!

Mama Dear

Another House Project list!

It feels like we are constantly working on this list but only a little, little bit gets to be marked off.  Such is life:

Life Projects:
* Get Life Insurance for Matt and I- in progress... next step, tests (for Matt, mine are done, then results).
* Start 403b plan and putting $50/paycheck away to start- in progres, next step, roll over pension, submit thingy to HR.  Paperwork filled out, just need to call.
* Get a will in place
* Make a doctor's appointment with new doctor
* Talk to Financial Guy
* Get new insurance to save money
* Send Frye Boots in for stitching
* Get Library Card
* Update DMV with address
* Make Cashi's first year CD/Video montage
* Scrapbook projects
      * Finish Wedding Scrapbook
      * Finish Family scrapbook
      * Finish College scrapbook
      * Finish 2010 Project Life scrapbook
* Taxes 2010

House Projects:
* Create chalkboard calendar
* Put up chalkboard calendar Deleted as the chalkboard thingy is in progress!
* Order windows
* Hall Bath Renovation
      * Many things have been completed but were not on this list, including: select paint, paint walls, cut wainscotting, buy and install light, patch up drywall
      *  Things to add: paint wainscotting, touch up paint, re-grout and seal floor, paint trim/pieces, install fixtures, hang light after paint dries, caulk fixtures in shower, hang shower curtain rod,
      *  New additions: Hang Medicine cabinet, install final paint job/touch up on moulding/trim, install hooks
      * Find shelving for Hall Bath
      * Obtain Mirror for Hall Bath
* Master Bath Renovation
      * Paint new sink base for Master Bath Renovation
* Repaint Master Bedroom
* Knock out wall between Kitchen and Living Room... really, did I put this on here.. this is probably 5 years down the road.  Progress!  We met with a designer who gave us some good ideas and an estimate.  Timeline is now probably 3 years down the road. 
     * Purchase new refrigerator
* Paint dining table?
* Paint chairs
* Paint Secretary?
* Paint Chalkboard Menu Thingy- It's cut!  Hang Chalkboard! Hang Chalkboard in Cashi's room!
      * Get shelf/Hang Shelf
* Figure out if Microwave can be fixed.  Figured out its a separate unit, so it can be replaced! Progress!
* Hang House Numbers 
* Rebuild/replace fence!  
* Replace deck
* Build Outdoor shower aka Matt's "Master Bathroom" project

House Project List update again

Cuz we've made some progress!!

Life Projects:
* Get Life Insurance for Matt and I- in progress... next step, tests.  Waiting on the guy.
* Start 403b plan and putting $50/paycheck away to start- in progres, next step, roll over pension, submit thingy to HR.  Paperwork filled out, just need to call.
* Get a will in place
* Make a doctor's appointment with new doctor
* Talk to Financial Guy
* Get new insurance to save money
* Send Frye Boots in for stitching
* Get Library Card
* Update DMV with address
* Make Cashi's first year CD/Video montage
* Scrapbook projects
      * Finish Wedding Scrapbook
      * Finish Family scrapbook
      * Finish College scrapbook
      * Finish 2010 Project Life scrapbook
* Taxes 2010

House Projects:
* Create chalkboard calendar
* Put up chalkboard calendar Deleted as the chalkboard thingy is in progress!
* Order windows
* Hall Bath Renovation
      * Many things have been completed but were not on this list, including: select paint, paint walls, cut wainscotting, buy and install light, patch up drywall
      *  Things to add: paint wainscotting, touch up paint, re-grout and seal floor, paint trim/pieces, install fixtures, hang light after paint dries, caulk fixtures in shower, hang shower curtain rod,
      *  New additions: Hang Medicine cabinet, install moulding/trim, install hooks
      * Find shelving for Hall Bath
      * Obtain Mirror for Hall Bath
* Master Bath Renovation
      * Paint new sink base for Master Bath Renovation
* Repaint Master Bedroom
* Knock out wall between Kitchen and Living Room... really, did I put this on here.. this is probably 5 years down the road.  Progress!  We met with a designer who gave us some good ideas and an estimate.  Timeline is now probably 3 years down the road. 
     * Purchase new refrigerator
* Paint dining table
* Paint chairs
* Paint Secretary?
* Paint Chalkboard Menu Thingy- It's cut!  Hand Chalkboard! Hang Chalkboard in Cashi's room!
* Get shelf/Hang Shelf
* Figure out if Microwave can be fixed.  Figured out its a separate unit, so it can be replaced! Progress!
* Hang House Numbers 
* Rebuild/replace fence! 

21 months

Dear Cassius,

Wow!  Time is flying by!  We've done a lot since my last letter and I'm eeking this in just before you turn 22 months! 

We had a great trip to Witch Lake and you L.O.V.E.D. it!  Every waking moment of it.  You had so much fun playing "boo" with Andy and Georgie.  You weed wacked every day.  You played in the water (a bit) with your Gramma and you loved to watch the saws and tools while Papa and Keith worked (tool are sharp- you remind us!).  A few highlights from the trip:
* You got to see Uncle Brett cut down a tree, with a chainsaw!  You still talk about this! 
* You got to see your other Uncle Brett, Aunt Mikki and cousins Kinley and Karsyn.
* You had a blast with Andy and Georgie doing all sorts of things.
* You flew with mom on the way out and dad on the way back and you did pretty well... it wasn't easy but we made it!
* You got to sleep with us a few nights in the last month or so.  It seems that in a new place, you just like to snuggle.  I kinda like it!

Speaking of snuggle... you learned to say the word "nuggle" and will often request it, especially in the morning.  Your vocab expands every day and you are stringing words and thoughts together all the time.  A couple of days ago you said "uncle" "picture" "raccoon" "phone" "white car"... because the day (or two) prior, Jeremy (aka Uncle Jeremy) came over and showed you a picture of a raccoon on his phone. I can't really remember, but I think the raccoon was near a white car!  Holy moly! 

I can't remember if this is new or not, but you know all your colors! and you are learning to count.  You've got 1, 2, 3 down (especially since we frequently use that to prepare you for what's to come next) and can count aloud to get Daddy to run through the "spinklers" with you.

You love to play with the big kids and can easily get into what ever game they are playing, be it hide and seek, duck duck goose or red light, green light.

It's been a big month for us as we decided to make the switch with your daycare...so August 15th, you start up at a new daycare.  I hope you love the learning, and I think you will.

Oh... I almost forgot.  The temper tantrums have officially started.  Your first true tantrum was hilarious (to us).  You were S.O. upset because you couldn't hold the package of graham crackers.  You kept wailing "brown" (as in brown graham crackers) and "package".  Kicking, screaming, flailing, limp body, screaming and screaming for a good 20 minutes.  Then you got up, asked for a peach (and I gave it to you) and all was okay with the world.  Silly boy!

I know I say this every month, but you are the love of my life and a joy to watch.  I get excited for the times we share because you are just hilarious.

I love you,

Mama